chemo or not to chemo

I forgot to mention chemo.  I think many assume that I am in the midst of that now.  I certainly expected to be, but it hasn t started.
My chemo doctor and I have met just once on March 10th.  It was an hour long informational interview and he then ordered  certain tests on the tissue samples.  These are needed to determine the kind of chemo to create.

We had an appointment for 3 weeks later, when the test results would be done and I would feel better.
However, one crucial test still isn't done.  I have cancelled and reset our appointment 2 times now.  The next date is April 21st when the company says the results will be available.
So here is one test result that the Dr shared a while back:
  Using a computer program created from data from thousands of breast cancer patients, he was able to determine that my cancer has a 40 to 50% chance of recurrence. not so hot.
Taking an aromatase inhibitor drug for the rest of my life will cut that in half.  Very good.
Undergoing chemo will cut it by 5%.

Full disclosure:  This is data from a computer model.  The test we are waiting for will give much more precise information about these data based on my tissue sample.

So as it stands, 40 to 50% percent can be cut to, lets say, 25%.  and chemo could cut it to 20%.
So is the pain and misery of chemo worth that small gain?

friends everywhere

You all just blow me away.  I cant believe the cards that keep coming from people I have worked with these past 2 years but have never met.  I guess webex is a good communication vehicle after all!
I also received a bucket of Ghirardelli chocolates!
And a beautiful silver necklace with the breast cancer ribbon, a pink bead and a sand dollar with the word Courage.
It means a lot to me that you guys havent forgotten me even though your are really much too busy.

I would invite you all to come and share my chocolates,  but they are all gone.

April 13

Hello, I took time off from adding another update because I am sick of talking about me frankly.
What you have missed is CT scans, an MRI an ultrasound and .... 6 Doctors visits.
My appendix situation seems to be all settled and I am healed but still recovering my strength.  So that was my last visit with her.  However, I am an example of "If you look hard enough, you can find something."  My abdominal area has been examined in every way possible so yes, they did find something.  I have a polyp on the wall of my uterus.
This is a sign of uterine cancer - but it is accompanied by other signs like bleeding, sudden loss of weight.  I have NONE of those symptoms.  However, no one trusts me any more because I have breast cancer so I am scheduled for another operation to have it snipped off.  No actual date yet.
So I got rid of my appendix doctor but acquired a gynecologic surgeon.
Meanwhile, I am healing but can't believe how weak and tired I get. Last friday I was going all day to a dr at 8 AM and then another Dr at 4:30 PM.  With errands in between.  I drove myself using my son's car because its an automatic shift ( never realized before this how you use your abs to push down a clutch.)

I got it all done but that night and next day I was exhausted and in pain.  Took a percoset for the first time in 2 weeks.

Weather improving and being outside to sit in sun is now possible.

April 3

Today I visited my breast surgeon. He told me to stop expecting to feel better than I do.  My body is recovering from 2 surgeries and it will take 2 months to recover.  I didn't ask him from which date but the appendectomy was less than a month ago.  I am going to readjust my attitude and not expect the next nap to cure me.  That should help decrease the level of frustration I feel.
It is especially tiring to have to keep asking for help.  Next week I only have one dr appt so my drivers will get a rest.  Maybe they will stop being afraid to read an email from me.

Today a  friend drove me - a 15 minute ride - to Glastonbury.  As we waited, I was feeling cocky and asked her if she would care to go to lunch together while we were in the town of 100 Restaurants. I also wanted to repay some of the many favors she has done for me.
So we went out to lunch and I was exhausted after reading the menu.  I doubt I was a scintillating conversationalist.  We got home by 2 and I went straight to bed and slept for 2  1/2 hrs.

anita

The Beauty of Cards

I never knew before now how much a card can mean.  This is a sample.  I wish I could show more of the them.  I will work on creating an interesting collage.  I cant stand to let them turn into a pile so some of them are displayed on my bedroom wall - always visible from my bed.  I walk by and re read often.
A lesson to me on how I can show another person that they are cared for.

April 2

I want a t shirt that says "I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired."  I went to appendix Dr today and the issue of the pain in my right side still exists.  She was an hour late because of doing an emergency appendectomy, and since I was once an emergency appendectomy, I did not complain!  The CT scan shows that there is still fluid there and maybe its around my ovaries?  Frankly, I'm too tired to keep up anymore.  The crucial thing is that she gave me a prescription for more percoset.  I can take them at night when the pain is most uncomfortable.  Love my drugs. 

I am to go for an MRI next to get a better look at the fluid.  One possible solution may be to have a CT guided needle stuck in me to suck it out.
sounds fine, lets do it.
I see Breast Dr tomorrow but that is not an exciting event, drain site is healing fine.  He is handsome and witty but tho Id like to prolong our relationship, this may be our last visit.
My friends are driving me to these daily events. I am blessed.  

I am on the prowl for happy books.  not sappy. but I had a stack and some have been eliminated because they are about slavery or a guy losing his moral code and falling into crime,  I need happy thoughts when Im trying to fall asleep.
spring is springing.  I cut some forsythia branches today and put them in a vase to force the blooms and hurry things along a bit.
At this point I have no Dr or tests for next week.  Empty calendar.  Yes!
I had a great time watching the Basketball tournament this weekend with my son John.  UConn won of course and that was quite a game.  Men and women are doing wonderful.  This weekend will be a fun game to watch again.  Hope you all have the time.

Anita

March 29, Saturday

Hello,
I have sunken into the I can't tell my days apart syndrome as if I were on vacation.  I expected a construction man yesterday, and when he was an hour late I called and had to hear him explain that the appointment was for Saturday, tomorrow.... not Friday.  red face.


Nothing interesting to report.  I am sick and tired of being sick and tired.  My PCP gave me some pills to help settle my tummy which is still churning from the trauma.  He explained the numbness in the outside of my left thigh as being caused by the appendix infection. The fancy name for it is Meralgia paresthetica.  
I may sue my appendix, though, for all this aggravation.


I was supposed to meet with oncologist on Wednesday this week to determine the course of my treatment.  However, a test result will not be ready by that time so the appt has been postponed to the 14th.  That is disappointing. 
Meanwhile I have a test or dr appointment every day this past week and next week.  So I am not just sitting here eating bonbons!


Go UConn!


Spring is here but she brought drizzles.  Hey, we aren't shoveling it.


Anita

March 24th Monday

Hello,
I had 2 visitors today and I actually stayed awake through the whole visit.
This is a milestone because I have had offers from kind friends and family to visit and I keep saying no, thank you.  It seems to puzzle folks - maybe offended them, I'm not sure - but I was just too tired to talk that much, or listen to someone else talk.  I can't even read a book, for crying out loud.

However, today, I am glad to report that I have been pain free all day.  And taken no pain meds at all- even Advil.  and I have not had a nap!  I'm am not trying to avoid a nap as I believe sleep is healing time, but I haven't wanted to go to sleep.  Prior to this, that urge was pretty clear.
A card today from my cousin - who is a nurse therefore an authority - said that based on her experience, I am allowed 6 months of faulty memory.  So since that is exactly what I am experiencing, I will claim that wonderful excuse for that amount of time.

If I can remember to....


anita

March 20, 2014. Thursday

Yesterday, the main event (to normal people) was a trip to my breast surgeon, as I call him.  My original breast surgeon was Dr Zarfos and due to some anticipated complications, she sent me to this plastic surgeon also.  Dr Cech.  He was there at the surgery and ended up taking over to the extent that afterwards he said, "you are MY patient now." So I have had all my follow up appointments with him.
He is smart and not bad looking and I have tried to be pleasant - a girl needs a good plastic surgeon as a best friend,  don't you agree?
On the way there, I got my driver lost because I thought I remembered how to get there.  Thank goodness she had a GPS to save us.  By the time I walked into the office and STILL didn't recognize anything, I realized that I had in fact never been there before.  I had been to his Farmington office and this was Glastonbury.
Drugs!  Love 'em!
It was a short visit - there at 11 out by 11:30, and I went home had brunch and did MY favorite thing: went back to sleep!  Woke up at 9 PM.  Ate dinner provided by a good fairy, and went back to sleep for the night. That has become what I consider to be my main event.

Have a great weekend all you poor working slobs!

Anita

March 19, 2014

In previous episodes:
Mastectomy all done (2/24), appendectomy all done (3/7).  Our heroine is now supposed to recover from both and get ready for chemo.

This episode:
Hello!
Meal train has started and Johnny and I had a great dinner last night.

Yesterday I went for a CT scan and a bone density test.  I was there at 11 and got home at 4 pm and went right to sleep.  Woke for a good dinner, then back to sleep for the night.

I am still on pain meds as I have pain in my right side that is worse at night.  The Dr has said all along that the heavy antibiotics I am on is to prevent an abscess  (pus filled sac). (ugh). 

CT scan results shows a fluid collection at site of appendix. uh oh.

So, I saw my appendix Dr today and she says the mass of fluid the CT scan shows around the site is kinda small to be an abscess. After 10 days she would expect it to be bigger.  It could also be just some fluid that will eventually go away. 

 The pain I have in that side could be due to the 3 cuts they made in the muscle to do the surgery.  So she gave me more percoset (yum) and said to take Advil as well for the inflammation.  Another CT scan in a week to 10 days hopefully will show the fluid is reduced or gone.  And the pain should be gone then also.

So I was not scheduled for another surgery to drain abscess as I had feared.

The CT scan also showed some sort of fluid in my uterus which they cannot guess at. So, I go for an ultrasound next week to see what that is.

I didn't even ask about the bone density, I assume my bones are ok.  Head is, of course, hard.

So I continue to rest when I am not being dragged off to see a Dr.  I have to see breast surgeon tomorrow. I think that wound is healing OK.

All this traveling around I am doing is courtesy of

 many friends and my son as I cannot drive while on drugs... and I like my drugs!

Thanks for the prayers and keep them coming.

Anita

Jan 17, 2014

Hi
First blog ever for me!  I am still waiting for a surgery date  My friends are in touch and always supportive.  Andrew is here this weekend and we are having our adventures and fun. My spirits are OK and I am doing  OK.